THE TRUTH>.<

Their isn't anything you can say that will make the pain go away,

Their is always going

to be sorrow that haunts me like no tomorrow

the hidden agenda

I found out the hard way cause I took a long puff and passed out in the driveway.

IVS AND A STOMACH PUMP

YOU MAKE ME SICK

I HATE YOU...AND YET I STILL LOVE YOU.

your dirty deed went punished when I saw you hit her, remember I sliced you 2inches deep

then laughed in my mind as you cursed

I HATED YOU... THEN

LATER

REALIZED THAT I STILL LOVED YOU

slipped me a twenty to ease your pain as awful

thoughts went through my brain

your a coward hear me

their is something your not and thats a daddy!

but their is somthing you are and thas a mistake

YOU SUCK!

HEY YOU KNOW WHAT

I lied their is something else that you are and thats

A WEED HEAD!

glad your dead in my mind I wish I could've went blind when I saw you sell her that stuff

I'VE HAD ENOUGHT!

I HATE YOU

nary the father daughter dances,long embarrassing talks,or strolls in the park

just dirty lungs

Kermitt Dawson sr.

not daddy nomore excuses or

lies

just hear my last replies

I HATE YOU... BECAUSE I... STILL LOVE YOU

BLAIR TAYLOR

NORMALITY

only a state of mind,society's way of reminding us that its in control

calm cool collected and so laid back is this how a teacher is suppose to act?

their are a lot of things that set you apart from norm.

creating seducing music just watching you tickle the ivories or piano keys which ever you prefer

a voice as smooth and aged as yours can't be compared to a summers

day,

when I connect your dots my eyes loose focuse

seeing spots yes I am hopeless when it comes to speaking therefor I write.

Blair Tylor musical creator undreneath you wing is where I want to be,teach me all sorts of musical things

learning so much in the musical world I don't want to loose touch

cause Im Billi3 the girl that wants more than just poetic flowers

BLAIR TAYLOR

the name that lets me remember that dreams can come true

whenever I'M STUCK

not having a clue so glad that I walked into your life

simply your the one and only

BLAIR TAYLOR >.<

TAJA

YES!

for it is the name that torments the sweet,Innocent,and untouched...yet o course.

I'm enigmatic oh so distorted,and Undesired,

watching you trying to solve me as if I were a math problem riddled with

Exponents n variables amuses me sooo you try then....FAIL

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

told you so

your simply using the wrong tactic.

looking me up in a simply won't cut it you

dimwitted fool!

I am undefinable because so simply my name is taja

meaning crown

but I don't feel like royalty though,

I feel.....humm? I feel....humm?

anyway

I've read a book on recent famous serial killers

pissed for I am not mentioned

have I not killed enough?

Musical Thoughts

meaningful words

though writing poetry makes me absurd

mouth being stitched saying not a word good ole right hand writes my thoughts for me

voice being stolen by you every thyme you read!

So yes I'm Taja the creator

name meaning crown disturbing thoughts,poetic soul,plus I'm quite profound.

If you make me smile surely I'll make you frown

because so simply my name is Taja name meaning crown.

TEDDY

Open your heart,

let me look into soul

your life interests me and it'll never grow old...

for you've been my protector

strong, and oh so independent but I feel as thought,

my baby is hiding something pray tell what is it?

uncontrollably ticklish, do you smile at the sight o death well...

WHAT IS IT?

This game isn't fun

you and I a pair o socks we are.

Just waiting... n waiting... n waiting

every ones last choice, oddly colored with a hint of mystery

YET,

we stick together by an electric bond.

You and I have always loved

but shy ,timid,oh so gentle was in the past

unaware that our love was meant to last.

indeed I've caressed you mind in ways you wouldn't have imagined

Tyrone a.k.a Teddy

always a fond name to say when I know your mine

So unravel your mysteries now revel the face of you

be aware that the skeletons in your closet aren't as bad as you think.

unvale yourself boyfriend o mine always

as you caress my mind.......

I LOVE YOU TEDDY YOU'RE ONE OF O KIND!

Good-Bye

So long and fair well to these pages unread.

I'll surely miss those demonic words inside of my head,

outsiders beware,of my words that contain swords thats written on these pages.

Taja Brionne Dawson

remains my name and forever it'll be and yet

BILLIE

reins the stamp.

Good-bye to all of my pain n sorrow...that haunts me like there isn't a tomorrow,

As I write this poem all is left from me is a sigh

because all theres left to say is (sigh)

GOOD-BYE

My Horror Story

Behind these doors my nightmare begins beginnings,middles and the ends...

so be aware please don't tell your friends,This is...

MY HORROR STORY!

They've mentally abused me in the past memories

I didn't want to last,stuck in my brain driving me insane,this is my horror story.

Awake at night from constant crying, somethymes I feel like dying my mouth is stitched my twine and binding

I HATE LIVING THIS HORROR STORY!

These cards I've been dealt turns around cutting me like glass

to those who think it'll be Ok PLEASE just shove it in your

ASS!

the life you save might be your own so why am I stuck inside this hell all alone?

PLEASE HELP I NO LONGER WANT TO BE ALONE

"GET ME OUT OF THIS HORROR STORY!"

Stabbed by "dear mommy and dear ole step-dads words"

nope nothing positive to say,

outside side a mask hides my scars

inside the house I'm behind bars HELP...ME...PLEASE !

For some who read maybe shocked,others awed maybe a few are appalled.

well your reading it and I'm living it for you see this is...

MY HORROR STORY

Poetry flows threw me pulsating rhythmically

in my brain with thoughts I can't desiper

luring me into it's world of unknown wonders yet again.

poetry and I a relationship only we can understand,

I am the humble puppet and my strings are in poerty's hands.

BLACK

An open eyed stare into the dark,

a shade that contains nothing within something.

Several inkblots my therapist shows me,

and the droplets that falls from my eyes.

The name of a berry which is PURPLE,or dark BLUE even...

SO WHAT IS BLACK !

An abyss of nothing so why not jump in you might fall...

 you might not ready to take a chance?

White walls surround me,a blank stare from within

 taking my sharpie and scribble the black in.

Take my hand and together we can enjoy the view of the darkness,

So please don't worry about what you lack, sometimes reality can be the shade of

BLACK

THE CREATOR

Creator of these words your reading and the previous in my past

The manipulator of my pen!

seeing nothing but scattered pieces o poetry trying to keep it inside but everything just sorta spilled out from within...my mind always,

finding time to pause my mental insanity to create poetry

even though my heart lays heavy

desperately pleading for my mouth to speak the words my hand has written so some one could hear!

But for you see my mouth is stitched closed figuratively. Hurt by the unknown. So simply,

shall I tell you my name? give up my identity? take off my cloak of invisibility?

YES!

No more shall my name be hidden,

My name is Taja Dawson

but just call me BILLIE.

Insomnia

I've been cursed with insomnia therefor I am an insomniac,

Sleepless nights, pacing the floor...I'll never get back.

A room with no doors

nothing but an old window watches me

it's dirty and metal bars bind it shut.

"There's no way out!"

I scream inside of me,

I can't see out but outsiders can see in.

They mock,They tease I

Desperately beg them please to restrain from their remarks,

but its no use They can't hear my pleas.

Tears and Sorrow aren't shown through my eyes, for they are to tired and filled woe from being opened.

.......96 hours...27 minutes,and 7..6..5..4.. seconds and counting

losing my mind with every minute that passes by,becomings more...and more

powerless.

My color sense is gone no more YELLOWS,REDS,or BLUES, the only color my eyes can process is

BLACK!

Mournful screamsECHOThroughout the room,

My muscles grow limp

My eyes are sore

I CAN'T THIS ANYMORE!

I HAVE TO END THIS CURSE

clinching my fist hoping for good aim I Bust The Window

the very same, window that has watched me suffer.

A shard o glass

in my grasp

leads me to insanity

Deeply cutting into the vein inside my arm...

THE CURSED BLOOD FLOWS OUT THERE IS PLENTY OF HARM!

a voice asks me,''WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!'' as I pace the floor

YES! the cures can't hurt me any more

I lie on the floor and as I do

My eyes drift away

The gift I've been praying for is mine to reach,

No more am I trapped inside that room and the curse is lifted

so spritualy I sleep in peace.

love

As fragile as blown glass, as gentle as a new born entering the world,

I enjoy watching people experiencing what I've experienced.

I blush feeling...feeling flushed when you speak of it,

A forbidden fruit in the mist.

Your lover hugs you

Accompanied a kiss, Oh dear me I love to see

the first sign of true love. As intensely as the sky is BLUE

I promise I'll never fall out of love with you,

And as pale as the clouds are white I hope you'll have me in your arms tonight

We'll gaze at the stars under a blanket of moonlight,

comforted by your arms aided... by the wind wishing to myself,

"I hope this night will never end." as the moon fades into the sun, that our romantic night is done, I know now that I love you,...I know that you love me this feeling isn't like any I can put above because this is the feeling of

♥LOVE >.<♥

♪♪♥MUSIC♥♪♪

Seduced by the music

enjoying its natural high

influencing me to the possibilities that are endless.

I can actually touch the the sky, an emerald green ocean floating above me

with snow white fish clouds swimming slowly across.

I'm curious with the site before me

I cautiously skim the cloud with my index finger.

Pleased with this cloud I lay upon it and as I do I'm creating abstract poetry

making the words come together in sync,being high on music make me think.

It helps me explore all of the wonders I've been blind to before,The music guides

me through loops,spins and turns I can take while I relax

and let it control me,

My eyes are...rolled back,My body...is numb, and I can't

feel my hands. and yet I remain to write while high.

I need it

I want it

I crave more...music

The breath I breath the noise in my ears

speaks to me...Yes It is the remedy that keeps me sane,

calms the nerves inside of my brain.

I want it

I need more

PLEASE...JUST GIVE ME MORE

MUSIC